|The view of St Paul's|
Tonight I have feasted myself to the point of almost sickness on John Torode’s sexual culinary delights. I had never been to his restaurant at Smiths of Smithfields before but I will definitely be going again. Incredible food and an incredible view of the city.
After last night’s pork belly assault the last thing I wanted to see was a tray of pork bleeding belly, but the canapés started doing the rounds and out came the pork belly. And I ate one. After scoffing at least eight squares of the stuff last night I actually picked one up and put it in my mouth. Sometimes I really do disgust myself. I’m not going to lie, I even went in for a second, but as soon as it got in my mouth I knew I couldn’t do it so had to spit it into a napkin.
Classy as ever.
After a serious canapé serving we sat down for dinner. Each table was given two humongous seafood platters…then starters…main…desert…AND then cheese and biscuits. So.Much.Food.
The poor girl sitting next to me, who shall remain nameless because she’s lovely, picked a fight with a lobster claw from the amazing seafood platter and royally lost. It exploded and literally splattered like an egg ALL over her face. Like, ALL over. I was very mature and just helped her pick it off. But if it had been my best mate I would have been on the floor.
|Looking like a dwarf next to Daisy|
When I reached the point where I could no longer physically eat or drink another thing because I was on the verge of overflowing, I thanked Johnny T for such a delightful spread had a quick chat with the incredibly stunning and incredibly tall Daisy Lowe (she told me she was wearing jewellery worth a million quid (!) so was shitting it) and headed home.
It was the Wrigley’s Eat, Drink, Chew event, so I got given a goodie bag rammed with gum and was so busy trying to gather it all up I missed my bleeding tube stop and ended up in Hammersmith! Gutted. And I hadn’t done a safety wee before leaving Smithfields, so by the time I eventually managed to get to Fulham it was a definite code red. Rookie error of the highest level.
Oh well, at least the chewing gums are on me. Kids.